Why IBM and Oracle? Why?

Objective -> Download Lotus Domino Enterprise 64bit Edition for my domain.

This, should not be a difficult operation. Then again, whenever it comes to non-Microsoft software we inevitably come up against companies that think that they can do it better. Here’s the short answer: No, you can’t. Don’t fuck with the formula. If it ain’t broke, don’t fucking fix it.

Consider that if I were to download Exchange from Microsoft, I would log onto their site, select software available for me, scroll through to the Exchange 64bit edition and download the ISO. Tah-dah! I can use the Microsoft downloader or my own, it’s up to me. Either way, it’s a single file ISO to download.

But that isn’t our objective for today. Today, I want to download Lotus Domino Enterprise 64bit because that’s what our company uses. So I mission off to IBM’s website. First off, IBM, you’re fucking confusing. Username and Password request with an advice tip that the username is an email address, only it isn’t. Then you’ve got a Software Download Advisors that do little more than confuse the living fuck out of everyone. Regardless of this, we head over to the Lotus Notes download pages. Why, I ask, do you have so many different versions of the same shit? What is the difference between Lotus Domino Enterprise, Messaging, Web Messaging, and so forth? Why do you not simply have a single download?

Anyway, then we select Enterprise, select Windows 2008 and Windows 2003 as the version types we want, and select English. It finally takes us to the downloads page, where there are 3 downloads. Why there are 3 downloads is beyond me, at first I thought it may be 1 for Windows 2008 and 1 for Windows 2003,but no, it was for the Lotus Software, and two updates (the updates, btw, are larger than the actual software!). There’s no need to select any of them as they are all already selected and ready for the download. Awesome.

So we agree to the download and click on Download. The Download Manager pops up and then tells me sternly that Java is not installed. Well fuck. I install Java. Download Manager continues to tell me Java isn’t installed. I examine the FAQ, which has instructions on how to enable Java in the browser, except that they’re entirely incorrect. Check the plug-in, ensure that it is enabled, try again, no, still saying not installed. Read the FAQ, go to the Oracle website to download Java2SE. Only you can’t, you can download the SDK (and allow me to point out that the link to download Java from the IBM website takes you to the page where it tells you that it is going to download, but there are no download options).

So I click on the Get Java for your PC. It tells me that I already have the latest version of Java installed on my server. Go back to IBM, still telling me not installed. Fine. Fuck you too. Click on the settings page, change from Downloader to HTTP transfers. Suddenly, the packages are not single, unified downloads, but individual files of about 30-50MB each. 1.7GB worth. And there appears to be no option to select all of them, you have to select each file individually.

EDIT: So I noticed that I had misread the size of Lotus Domino. It isn’t 600MB as I first though (545MB to be exact). It’s 5.45GB! What. The. Hell. Total download size using the Download Director is 7.7GB. What the fuck. Seriously, I’ve seen Lotus Notes, I’ve used it, it’s crap at best, why the fuck are you 7.7GB!?!?!?

EDIT: Found out why it is so large. Remember where it asked what versions I wanted and I said Windows? Turns out IBM ignored that completely and wants me to download the Linux, the Solaris and the AIX versions as well. Why is beyond me, but again, fuck you IBM. Final download size is still 2GB. That is, however, because I am downloading both the 64bit and 32bit version, just in case.

Fuck you IBM.

Fuck you Oracle.

I’ve waisted about an hour on this crap now. Fuck you very much.

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